Why did I stop freelancing?

Between 2015 and 2020, I worked as a freelancer for nearly six years. However, aside from the initial joy of seeing my income grow in the first two years, from the third year onwards, I felt nothing but endless boredom, constantly seeking opportunities to escape this state of freedom. Why?

Firstly, freelancing is not about lying around doing nothing; it simply means you have no fixed rest periods, and therefore no fixed working hours. You can arrange your schedule as you please, for example, if you prefer to sleep during the day and work at night, it would be difficult to find a job that matches this in real life, but freelancing allows it.

This leads to a two-sided consequence: you must have the ability to completely control your work and life rhythm. Otherwise, you will either never get a break (at least your brain won’t rest, forcing you into anxiety); or you’ll stay up late working when you have work, and stay up all night partying when you don’t, never to have a regular life again.

Unfortunately, I am someone who is not very good at managing my time. Blurring the boundaries between work and life, the result is that my life is consumed by work. Aside from basic necessities like eating, sleeping, and showering, either my body or my mind is always engaged in work-related tasks. Additionally, in a state of freedom without constraints, my procrastination has become increasingly severe. When a major project arrives, it often follows a pattern of being relaxed at the beginning and rushed at the end: unable to relax during breaks and working tirelessly during overtime.

Second, there was a misunderstanding about freelancing among those around me at the time. As long as you’re in a state of freedom, people around you assume you’re “always available” and can’t understand why you might be “busy” on weekends. This inevitably leads to friction with family and friends over scheduling conflicts, which may be the price of being both busy and free.

Third, it’s probably an issue with the translation profession. In this field, no matter how much you improve or switch clients, your income ultimately depends on your hourly rate and the number of hours you work. Even if your rate is among the top in the industry, your monthly income is still tied to the number of hours you spend sitting at your desk. This creates another sense of insecurity: if you stop working, you stop earning. As long as the desire to earn money persists, there will never be a day of rest.

I, however, have begun to yearn for a career and lifestyle with ‘compound interest.’ The temporary hardships are acceptable, but once the tipping point is passed, one's income and lifestyle should no longer be directly correlated with the number of hours worked.

Now, after nearly six years back in the workforce, sitting at a desk has forced my brain to take real days off, but it has also brought inevitable drawbacks: the best periods of energy during the workday are forced to be allocated to specific tasks. At the same time, even if you're not in the best state, you can't rest (at least not openly slack off), or if you're in the best state, thinking about overtime work won't bring you another day of free time.

After experiencing both freelancing and full-time office work, I think I can muster the courage to look forward to the next cycle. But next time, it won’t be a simple “self-employed freelancer” status.

In the “retirement” life I envision, there must be work. If I still can’t guarantee a good work-from-home setup by then, I might opt for a shared workspace.

I will find a job with unpredictable income and flexible hours, but where income is not tied to working hours. It must grow over time, bringing compound interest to my life and income. Most importantly, it should ideally allow me to break away from team collaboration early on and make decisions independently.

Given these criteria, the options I can choose from may be quite limited. But there’s no rush; I have time to explore slowly before my next “retirement.”